“The Autodidact” [#1/7 Of Target Series]

As dust drifts downward from the sky,
And stayed delay when I must die
Clicks in with trade-off losses new
(For which there’s nothing I can do) –

Comes clearer day by day, I spit
In anger – “What’s the cause of it?”
I ask myself – I target-scan
To dump my anger if I can.

But I know really it won’t help;
At best, emotions drop in yelp
I give as anger’s tidal wave
Sweeps over me before my grave.

Lord, all those phony healer-types
Don’t heal within – they pour their might
Against some futile cause, not here,
Within – where impact’s tied to fear.

Perhaps that’s part we’d best address –
And the fear of dying – how to wrest
The few score days, or months of life
From satan’s end-point of our strife.

What is my loss – the one that hurts?
The ending part, for me that’s worst?
Its doors which close – as close they must
On all things ‘other’, lost to rust.

Well, Lord, that’s been my way in life –
I struggled ’gainst the cause of strife,
As if I could turn back such tide;
Wild victory You gave inside –

My heart as I moved day by day
Until each enemy I prayed
Would be turned back, fell down below
The Kingdom-layer I’ve come to know.

The teacher’s “Knowing”, stronghold fair,
Dissolved as Audie grew as player
In knowledge-stream of life above
Their academic push and shove.

“You cannot stop them – only they
Can bring an end it to social fray;
But they can’t stop you either, chum,
As you engage in learning’s fun.

“So have a blast, enjoy the quest
For what you seek – ignore the rest;
It’s not for you, it’s other’s fare;
Engage, enjoy your banquet there.

Thanks Lord for this.

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