Jostlin’

Relapse: threat of its return
Rage inside, oh how it burns;
Hope destroying, just as things
Get on track and new life sings.

Not reality of death,
Early signs things aren't the best;
New awareness of the road,
Details ugly – row that hoed.

I don't want to go that route;
Try on pants and buy that suit;
Lord, that's not a joyful day,
Knowing those who go that way.

Threat that outside limits there
Click in, gives my heart a scare;
Six years total – eeeesch the thought;
Raising questions – what I've got.

Cree-ish-like, just at the door,
“Oh, there's also one thing more –
CEA is up to one,
Range of normal is this sum –

“Change from last time is point two,
Not important, in my view;
We'll just watch it, in the range
See if there continues change.”

When I put it on a graph
Over year, there was no laugh;
Slow and steady was its rise,
Slope of a line (up) – not the size.

Wake up call ‘site two’ was then
To my lifestyle – “Stu just when
Will you change, bring things around
So rogue cells cannot abound?”

This time wake-up different is –
“What's important in life’s biz?
Hoe the roe my friend in that,
Lest the cancer come on back.

“Buckle down to what's out there
Central, when you tasks compare;
Lifestyle changes make – okay –
Treatment needed on the way –

“But select agenda yours
Not just fooling ’round with chores;
Just what’s central – undertake
Priorize, clear choices make.

“Don't let cancer set the pace
Sickness, treatment, be the race;
Life is lived within each scene
Circumstance – that's rich or lean.

“Tighten limits to our game
Faster, tighter – play the same;
Wring more out of cancer than
It rings that of you, my man.

“What have you new courage for
Since it beat at your front door?
Take that up move to front;
Giant now, no little runt.

“It's okay, that energy
In that anger, rage, you see,
Can propel you onward, man
Doing things few people can.

“Like she said that last night, ‘take care
Not to turn it back in there;
Let its focus be the spot
Where its focus burns out rot.’

“Keep your eyes up, out beyond
Where you live with cutting lawn;
Choose what matters most today
Laugh and sing, take time to play.

“Way you know, just plug it in;
Mentor those who've open been;
Make each shot count – quality
Balance now with quantity.

“Go back, look at lessons learned
First time round, don't let be spurned
All the truth you stumbled on
When first scum came to your pond.

“You'll be okay, fill each day,
Hours and moments, don't delay –
Pack it in, you've had reprieve,
Live out now what you believe.”

Lord, my journey's route emerged
In this ‘Giver land’ absurd;
You are right – I've tasks to do
Tighter game to play – in You.

Thanks for this short wake-up call
Like when truckers cattle haul,
Jiggles truck – cows lock their feet,
Then they turn – no upset meat.

Here's a ‘flick’ I feel beneath
My loose stance at ease I eat
Daily food, relaxed in here –
Now I brace with mini-fear.

Thanks for this ‘flick’ of the van
Bracing me so I withstand
What's ahead – both good or bad;
Thus proceed with joy – not sad.

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